I’ve been wondering. About life, about myself. About you.

I’m not even sure how to begin, except to say that the drive to Tarlac City is an escape — a chance to clear my mind amidst all the drama and uncertainties. The city, and the province of Tarlac in general for that matter, isn’t even known as a destination in its own right. Many travelers view Tarlac primarily as a transit point en route to destinations further north. But this is your hometown, and this trip was initially planned with you. Instead, this becomes a spontaneous journey with the hope of self-reflection and a sense of just getting it out of my system. So, on a random weekday, I set out on a long drive with Kenneth instead. Which makes me wonder, what should we expect?

We leave Metro Manila at around 8 in the morning, and after about two hours cruising through NLEX and SCTEX, we reach Tarlac City. Our first stop, just at the southern edge of the city, is the Hacienda Luisita complex.

The Hacienda Luisita is controversial primarily due to its historical context and the issues surrounding land ownership, labor rights, and social justice. These controversies highlight broader issues related to social inequality and the intersection of politics and business interests in the country. But a visit nonetheless, for those who care, encourages reflection on these matters, and it prompts us to assess our own role in advocating for fairness and equitable opportunities for marginalized communities. Which makes me wonder, do you think of such issues?

We have breakfast at a fast food chain, stroll around a mall, and visit the Aquino Center and Museum. It’s undergoing renovation, but a few items are placed in a room for display nonetheless.

We then drive to the Diwa ng Tarlac a few kilometers north, just across the provincial capitol. The museum’s collection of artworks, mostly from locals, provides a window into the artistic soul of Tarlac and highlights the impact of art and creativity on the fabric of the province’s communities. Which makes me wonder, how do you express yourself creatively?

A few minutes’ drive further is the San Sebastian Cathedral The Neo-Gothic church stands out with its imposing architecture amidst the bustling cityscape. And with no mass being held, there’s a sense of desolation in the church grounds. Which makes me wonder, are you spiritual? Religious?

Across the street is the Tarlac City Plazuela, which is similarly subdued. The area is eerily quiet, with only a few scattered visitors. Despite the tranquility of the midday hour, I imagine the plaza transforming as the sun sets and the city comes alive with activity. The plaza would be illuminated by the warm glow of street lamps, with colorful banners fluttering in the evening breeze and strains of music drifting through the air. The scent of mouthwatering street food wafting from vendors’ stalls would mingle with the laughter and chatter of families and friends gathering to enjoy the festivities. Which makes me wonder, do you join these festivities when you’re in your hometown?

After lunch at a Japanese restaurant, Kenneth and I venture into Kart City Tarlac for some adrenaline-pumping driving. After buying my ticket, I strap into a kart and don a helmet, position myself on the race track along with a handful of other visitors, and listen to a staff member enumerate the rules. With a roar of engines, we are off, hurtling down the track and navigating hairpin bends. I get a sense of exhilarating sense of freedom, as I try to keep up with the others. Which makes me wonder, do you now get a sense of freedom as well? Have you moved on from him?

On our way back to the SCTEX going back home, we pass by the old train station. The dilapidated structure, tuck amidst a line of weathered houses, evokes memories of a time when the railway was the lifeline of the region, connecting distant communities and fostering a sense of progress. Yet, despite the ravages of time, there remains a sense of dignity and resilience in its beaten frame. Which makes me wonder, how do you pick yourself up from the constant pressures and poundings of life?

As we merge back onto the expressway, leaving behind a city I’ve never thought of exploring previously, I wonder, how do you find yourself back to your journey to what you call home?